Unrefined

by Jessica Davey

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03:25
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04:00
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03:27
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04:26

about

This is a bedroom pop album. It was written mostly on the floor and recorded entirely on an iPad.

I am releasing it from the hotel room where I live now.

credits

released May 11, 2018

license

all rights reserved

tags

about

Jessica Davey Nashville, Tennessee

A piano vocalist turned bedroom pop producer. Influenced by 70s singer-songwriters and jazz fusion. Originally from the U.S. but frequently resides in Scotland.

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Track Name: Trepanning
Trepanning

Lying here alone in my bed
I can see everything
‘Cause someone made a hole in my head
To let the spirits in
I can’t show
All I know

Yeah someone made a hole from my head
To where the spirits live
I am inescapably led
To where the meaning is
What to do
I feel it too

But I can take it
I’m fine, no mistake
Nothing wrong, no nothing wrong
I am strong

See the people looking at me
With curiosity
But the only part that they see
Appears monstrosity
Hard to touch
I’m too much

When everybody looks at my life
They call me “sensitive”
Surviving at the edge of a knife
Becomes imperative
Everywhere
I don’t care

‘Cause I can take it
I’m fine, no mistake
Nothing wrong, no nothing wrong
I am strong

Someone made a hole in my head
To let the spirits in
Someone made a hole in my head
And let them in.
Track Name: She Rules Alone (Explicit)
She Rules Alone

“The prince is the dream” we’re told
Find him before you get old
You’ll support everything he’ll do
Your story isn’t about you

I heard it and I believed
That someday I’d be received
We could live in a fairy tale

Now I’m picking up the pieces
Picking up the pieces of my life
No matter what he says
I know I can be more than someone’s wife
This princess, she rules alone

One April he lured me in
Together we’d begin again
He promised me everything
Love, friendship and a perfect spring

And summer until July
When I started to ask why
He had to smoke so much goddamned weed

I’m picking up the pieces
Picking up the pieces of my life
No matter what he says
I know I can be more than someone’s wife
This princess, she rules alone

The kingdom was in despair
Our dream was a new nightmare
No, nothing was as he’d said
No castle, just a garden she’s

All August I had been kept
In misery until September
Came and I got away

I’m picking up the pieces
Picking up the pieces of my life
No matter what he says
I know I can be more than someone’s wife

October was not so tough
November I’d had enough
Of his shit so I dumped his ass

I’m picking up the pieces
Picking up the pieces of my life
No matter what he says
I know I can be more than someone’s wife
This princess, she rules alone
Track Name: Marathon
Marathon

Sometimes it’s hard
Not that I thought it would be easy
It’s harder than I thought it would be

But I’m never alone
Whenever I feel I’m at the limit
So many feel the same as me

It’s a marathon
But we carry on
After all, no one said we had to like it

If that’s how it is
Then that is the way it has to be
I can’t change the way of things

Yeah that’s how it is
Living has always been a struggle
A fight to go on all over the world

But it’s getting me down
I’m at the bottom of the mountain
Feeling like a scared little girl

It’s a marathon
But we carry on
After all, no one said we had to like it

If that’s how it is
Then that is the way it has to be
I can’t change the way of things

It’s a marathon
But we carry on
After all, no one said we had to like it

If that’s how it is
Then that is the way it has to be
I can’t change the way of things
Track Name: What Am I To You
What Am I To You?

You say I’m what you’re looking for
I say I’ve heard it all before
Every time you tell me how much you like my hair
Reaching out to touch like I’m some kind of animal
Is that what I am to you?

What am I to you?

And you say it’s a compliment
Is that what you really meant
So you’ve never had someone like me before
Looking at my shape like I’m some kind of novelty
Is that what I am to you?

What am I to you?
Am I worth the same as you?

And I thought we were moving on
All the time this was going on
Have you some idea what it feels like to hear from a friend
“Sorry but this time there’s no place for a black one”
Is that all I am to you?

What am I to you?
Am I worth the same as you?
Am I worth the same, the same as you?
Track Name: Garden State
Garden State

I can just remember
The brown house on a hill
From the time I was 2 to the time I was 7 we lived there
At the time I could not know that New York was such a big deal

And that city felt so far
But we loaded up the car
We moved to the Chicago suburbs

When I was just a child
So I don’t know the way
To get back to the Garden State
New Jersey
It is all I know of New York

It’s across the ocean
Someone else’s dream
Now my friends go to visit and they tell me there is more life there
And now as I get older I’m starting to know what they mean

But it’s all so far away
And I don’t know what to say
We moved to the Chicago suburbs

When I was just a child
So I don’t know the way
To get back to the Garden State
New Jersey
It is all I know of New York

So I don’t go back there
But I never left
It’s a part of the past, it’s a memory, may be the future
It’s a part of my being that I never knew that I kept

And although I don’t know how
I am thinking of it now
But we moved to the Chicago suburbs

When I was just a child
So I don’t know the way
To get back to the Garden State
New Jersey
It is all I know of New York
Track Name: Olympus Is Gone
Olympus is Gone

In the old days, we looked to the sky
To find meaning, to find answers why
For escaping into the sublime
So now people called celebrities
Become risen into deities
Into something approaching the divine

Like the ancient ones, imperfect but immortal
It’s a new mythology for modern times

Because Olympus is gone
And all the gods have moved on without me
Because Olympus is gone, Olympus is gone

Now I Insta a little too much
And use Twitter a little too much
I am helpless, hopelessly obsessed
But it’s human, the way that I feel
It’s an instinct to find something real
Find some safety when life becomes a mess

But you may well ask, why’s it so important
I don’t know for sure, but I have a guess

It’s ‘cause Olympus is gone
And all the gods have moved on without me
Because Olympus is gone, Olympus is gone

Like imaginary friends, they’re what I make them
Part of them exists, but part of them is mine
All mine

Because Olympus is gone
And all the gods have moved on without me
Because Olympus is gone, Olympus is gone

Because Olympus is gone
And all the gods have moved on without me
Because Olympus is gone, Olympus is gone
Track Name: Universe City
Universe City

In the evenings I sat alone
Until the ringing of my telephone
I was waiting for the call
To be invited by anyone
To go out for unspecified “fun”
I thought I had it all

I had winter nights
Then there were summer nights
When it stayed light all night and I would
Drift through the twilight in that city
A northern city

Afternoons were in the park
Playing music, drinking before dark
I felt it would never end
But it ended one day
It was 3 years and kind of weird to live
In such a careless way
Every day, then never again

I wanted everything
When I had nothing I would take
Anything
And that city was my universe
My university
University

It is evening
I’m alone
Track Name: Shoreditch
Shoreditch

My Januarys are incomplete
Ever since we spent that one
Together flying high through the London streets
So we didn’t miss the sun

On the way back home
The night bus took so long
That we shared the headphones
Side by side, my favourite song

But you belong, I believe
You belong in my arms

Looking back on our history
Leaves me longing for the past
How could we be so good is the mystery
When I knew it couldn’t last

It’s a puzzle and the pieces seldom fit
It’s a puzzle and I don’t understand one bit

But you belong, I believe
You belong in my arms

I behaved responsibly
And I let nobody know
Because it hurt too much to say honestly
What it took to let you go

But I still wish I had a time machine
For as it is, I only see you in my dreams

But you belong, I believe
You belong in my arms

But you belong, I believe
You belong in my arms
Track Name: What Is My Life
What is my life?

I’d had an ordinary day
Until he made sure I heard all he had to say
He made up some words
To shoot them at me
They hit me on stage for everyone to see

Having survived the incident
He pulled me aside and tried to tell me what he meant
The music was loud, I still couldn’t hear
But his intoxication became all too clear

What is my life?
What is this night?
All I once knew exchanged
For something very strange
Tell me, what is my life?

Once I’d escaped the man for good
I thought I would see the show, enjoy it if I could
A woman got up and took off her clothes
And then a man pushed hardware up his nose

I couldn’t take it anymore
So I excused myself and headed for the door
Oh what relief, my evening was done
But I could see I was the only one

What is my life?
What is this night?
All I once knew exchanged
For something very strange
Tell me, what is my life?

What is my life?
What is this night?
All I once knew exchanged
For something very strange
Tell me, what is my life?
Track Name: Snowfall
Snowfall

Snowfall
More and more every day
Winter is here to stay
It is here to stay

Snowfall
Making the world so white
Bet I don’t sleep tonight
I won’t sleep tonight

I didn’t like you before
But I let you through my door
And you got the best of me
You got the best of me

Snowfall
Feeling it all so cold
Knowing I’m getting old
I am getting old

Snowfall
Covering up my shame
Only myself to blame
Only me to blame

I didn’t like you before
But I let you through my door
And you got the best of me
You got the best of me

Snowfall
The peace it is bringing lies
Kind of like your eyes
Kind of like your eyes
Snowfall....

I didn’t like you before
But I let you through my door
And you got the best of me
You got the best of me

I didn’t like you
But I let you through
And you got the best of me
You got the best of me

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